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Underground. He hated it. The walls felt too cold and the ceilings too low, the air too stale and the people around him too... confusing. He had no idea who to trust or if he could ever trust anyone again but himself - though even then he doubted himself. There were days when kindness challenged the tumbling mess of memories in his mind full of nightmares and images he was unable to separate from fantasy or reality.

He had lashed out at Katniss more times than he could count and although the shackles strapped to his body at night helped him stay in bed, they did not help him sleep in peace. Why was he even here? Why had they saved him? Especially her... She had looked so happy to see him yet all he could think about was the pain and suffering she had caused so many people.

The violent thoughts had calmed somewhat after the wedding, but they would still poke at his mind every now and then, tempting him. He still trusted no one.

Yet here he was now, guarded constantly and chained, but able to walk out of his room at least. He was headed down a corridor out of the wing that held the hospital rooms, not sure where he was going really... just anywhere that had better air. The guard following close behind was a constant reminder of his current state of mind, though a part of him was whispering that it was probably best like this.

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Was she ok? Was he really sitting there, tearing his hair out, and asking her if she was ok?

She wanted to reach out and shake him.

"I'm fine. It was just a nightmare."

If she hadn't gotten use to nightmares by now, the rest of her life was going to be hell. It would be, either way.

Her voice seemed to be calming him down a bit though nothing could stop his heightened sense of wariness now. Not for a while. But it was nice to hear her when she wasn't screaming - for her life, for her sister, for Rue, for whoever it was...

Finally, Peeta looked up from behind his arms, looking tired yet alert. "I thought I was in one when I woke up. That scream..."

Of course. Maybe by the end they had poisoned him enough that her scream wouldn't have been useful, but at the start? Hadn't Peeta said his worse nightmare was losing her?

And being changed by them.

That thought crashed over her again, like a punch to the stomach. It was good at sneaking up on her, unexpected.

"No. I'm here. I'm fine. I was just having a nightmare." About you. But she thought that might be good to leave out.

Nightmares. Will there ever be a time when they didn't have nightmares? Peeta wasn't so sure anymore.

He couldn't take this anymore though, the confinement, the feeling of helplessness, and this was suddenly the last straw. Standing up, he was shaky on his feet but it didn't stop him from hobbling over to the wall that had initially opened to throw them in here, banging on it angrily with his fists.

"Let us out already! We get your stupid game, we're done!"

He was done. With everything. All of this.

Scrambling after him, she felt her heart ski, and wasn't sure why. This wasn't aimed at her. And she wanted the hell out too.

They must be on camera. She didn't believe they couldn't see them.

As if in answer, a small slot opened at the bottom of the door, and a tray was slid in with two perfectly proportioned bowls of stew, accompanied by over cooked beets, 2 pieces of bread a piece and a glass of water each.

Katniss stared down at it for a moment. And then had to fight the urge to kick it across the room.

Well. That certainly hadn't been his idea of a response.

Even though he was realizing just how empty his stomach was, the hunger pains were nothing compared to his current rage at being kept locked up like animals, and he didn't even think before kicking the door as hard as he could with a frustrated cry... before it turned into a pained one because that was a very hard door and his foot was still made of flesh.

"Damn it!"

"Are you all right?"

She didn't want to grab him, even if that was her first response. Still she moved closer, hoping he hadn't done any lasting damage to his good foot. If he had....she wasn't sure what she had in here for first aid.

He wriggled his toes and arched his foot to make sure, sighing in relief when nothing felt broken. "Yeah... yeah, just stupid." At least he could admit to that much. "They clearly heard me."

"At least we know they aren't just leaving us down here for ever..."

Squatting down, she lifted up the tray, walking away from the door with it. Although she knew in reality if they were watching one point, they were probably watching the whole room, it made her feel better getting 'away' from them.

Settling in a far corner, she patted the floor next to her. "Let's eat."

He stayed by the door for the longest time, even when Katniss picked up the food and left, and it was only out of his intense hunger that he gave up kicking the steel doors for now and joined her. His body was still in a rush from the nightmares and waking up as they did, but his stomach was growling rather loudly now... not that either of them weren't used to that.

Peeta sat down beside her slowly, eying the food with reluctance. "At least we know they're not trying to starve us to death now."

Yeah, she was starting to get the idea this wasn't about killing them off. Or, if it had been, 13 had figured out that it wasn't going to work and were taking a new approach.

Then again, maybe she was being to harsh on them. Trap them in a dark, small space? Send them rations when they showed affection to each other? She could see how in someone's mind that might be a good way to jump start them getting along again.

Spoon of beets half way to her mouth, she stopped, mouth dropping open.

"This is Haymitch's idea."

He was already picking at the bread - almost judging it - when she stopped and said that. Confused, he stared at her expression, his mind unable to put two and two together as quickly as it could have before being hijacked.

"What, why do you say that?"

"Because this is recreating the came. They have us together, unsure...it's small, it's dim, we have nothing but each other. And when we behave?"

She held up her fork.

"I'm surprised were not getting notes to kiss." She said, anger building up, not thinking about that being a delicate subjet.

The cave... The cave. He remembered the cave. It was when he was at his lowest in the first Games and Katniss took care of him. He remembered snippets of conversation, of food, warmth, of restful nights because she was with him. And kisses. There had been many of those too, hadn't there?

"It... It really is similar," he frowned, eying their food suspiciously, suddenly wondering if they had put anything into it to weaken them further. He put the bread back down on the tray for now, refusing to eat it. "No one said we have to behave though."

"You can't not eat."

They only gave them enough food here to get buy. You couldn't exactly be a picky eater.

And she didn't trust herself not to eat his food if he didn't. Lord knows she'd stolen enough of Gale's.

"How do you intend to misbehave?" She eyed his foot, warily, wondering if he thought that was a good tactic.

"I can manage," he replied stubbornly, though he could admit that having it right there in front of him was making it more tempting. Not now though. He didn't trust it. He didn't trust much of anything.

He folded his arms against his chest, wrists pulling at the cuffs and grinding into them a bit out of comfort, a bad habit he'd formed recently. Maybe if he did something drastic they'd pay attention and let them go. He'd thought about so many ways to get out of his head and body lately... the need to end this nightmare growing more and more each day.

Katniss wouldn't kill him though, he knew that much now. But she would definitely defend herself if he attacked her. Would that work? Or would they know it was a plan...

God damn it.

"I'll figure out a way," he said darkly, wrists still grinding against the metal until the skin was raw and red.

Edited 2012-07-14 05:34 (UTC)

"If this food is all right for me, will you eat yours?"

The idea of him not eating worried her. A lot. Would a hunger strike get them out of here? Was that what he was planning?

Noticing the movement of his hands, she set down her fork and reached out. "You're hurting yourself."

Food was precious and he knew it, he'd never let it go to waste when he knew the feeling of true hunger, but he would much rather smell his freedom than stale bread right now.

"If you can trust it," he frowned. "I don't know why you would though, even if Haymitch is behind all this. President Coin isn't someone I'd stick my neck out in front of."

When she reached for his hands he tried to avoid them, curling his arms closer to himself. "It's fine, I... It helps me."

"Because they're be much easier ways to kill us."

And because she was hungry. Too much of her life was paranoid, and she wasn't going to add food to that list. Not right now.

Still, she stared at his poor wrist. Bloody and torn up, and she wanted to sooth them, take him to her mother, have them healed up. It wasn't nearly the worst things she had ever seen, not even on him, and she had no idea why it tore her up so much inside to see it. Why it triggered such a want to...fix it. To fix him.

He frowned at her words, wondering if she was right. Still, he wasn't about to take the first bite right now.

"Fine... If you're not dead in two minutes, maybe it'll be safe enough."

Well, that was one way to go about it. And she was starving, if he wanted to wait till his food was cold, he could do that. For her part, she'd learned thing in 13 were best eaten as quickly as possible.

"So clearly us not killing each other is not good enough to get us out of here."

He probably would have been the first to dive in if he wasn't hijacked, just to make sure he'd be the one to get poisoned before her, but things were different now. He wasn't quite at that self-sacrificing level yet.

At her comment his eyes darkened, looking down at the chains in his hands. "Then why haven't we tried doing that?"

"Wait, tried to kill each other?"

She felt like the answer to that was fairly obvious. But then again, maybe she shouldn't be assuming anything with him right now.

"If not doing that wasn't helping, maybe if we fought they'd separate us. Let us go."

Huh.

It was a good thought. But if they fake fought and Peeta snapped...and they didn't come to separate them...

She moved closer, in case they were being over heard.

"Could you keep yourself in check?"

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look at all the tags I'm ignoring <3

<333 "recreating the came" made me laugh, ngl

...opps. Calm your boner dude.

it's your fault okay

Are you saying I cause boners, peeta.

...... yes, yes I am

psh.

:3

>3

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