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The fight or flight instinct still hadn't slipped out of Katniss's damaged mind.

She knew, factually they were in District 13. Even though they didn't even know it exsisted up until a few days ago.

Well, some of them.

Her family was here. Peeta was here. Gale was here. Katniss? She was pretty sure half the time she was actually still back in the arena. She had nightmares, she'd always had nightmares, but none has seemed to follow her into reality quite the same way.

Today was one of those days. She was completely still, breathing heavy, staring at the door, certain that what was going to come through wasn't going to be some District 13 medic. Sure the empty room was about to fill up with Capitol peacekeepers, or...worse. There was always worse.

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"Can you imagine if it had?" He snorted slightly, arm raising out above them as he exclaimed, feeling silly. "Such scandal!"

She shuddered softly.

"How bad do you think it would have gotten? Them recording our lives?"

That really was a horrible thought wasn't it? He cringed slightly himself, wondering how long they would have had to hold up the star-crossed lovers act in that way... not that... his feelings were fake by any means. He was sure the Capitol citizens would have been devastated if Katniss didn't pop out a baby that didn't exist in nine months though.

"It could have turned into something really invasive," he said. "More... invasive, I mean. Like a show on the mundane parts of our lives. That would be awful but they'd love it."

Somehow, that bothered her more than the idea of their wedding being televised. Because in the mundane moment they could fill in the gaps to make things...better.

But if they didn't have those?

"...like when they made us have kids."

"Sorry about that... lie, by the way." At least now he could finally apologize to her about it properly. No one in 13 probably cared if they were even listening. "I didn't exactly prepare you. Though I usually haven't..."

She shrugged. She didn't really want to say it was ok...but she also understood. Getting a reaction out of her that was real was almost as important as getting it from the Capitol.

"I think I can forgive you."

"That's a relief," he sighed with another smile, arm coming down to wrap around her again. "After this, we won't have to lie anymore. I hope."

Though the unsaid question was whether or not her feelings were a lie at this point. He didn't know how to even ask.

She shrugged.

"Who knows what they have planned here. What role's they have picked out for us."

Katniss was not someone who had ever thought she'd have to think about politics. That was Gale's area. But all of this had changed it. And she was catching on.

"We'll probably get to find out in the morning," he sighed. For now, he was content to remain blissfully unaware.

She nodded, staring up at the dark ceiling.

"I have no doubt."

Tonight she had a feeling sleep would be a long time coming. At least, until Peeta drifted off, she would have some one to spend the hours with.

The arm around her shoulders suddenly held on a little tighter, almost afraid of letting loose because it would mean he'd give in to the comfortable bed and warmth of her body, to his tired mind. He didn't want to fall asleep yet. Not when he could stay in this bubble with her a little longer.

"So Gale was here too..." he brought up a little awkwardly, though it hadn't been his intention to sound that stiff. "I'm glad he's all right."

Gale.

Letting go and being with Peeta, while they were going into the Quarter Quell had been easy. She would never see Gale again. No choice had to be made, because there was no choice.

Now there was, again. And once again, things had shifted, deeply, and change everything between her and Peeta. Which changed things between her Gale.

She knew his question had more under it, but she wasn't sure what to say to that. So she ignored it.

"Yeah. I was glad he was there too. So it wasn't just us and Haymitch."

It was probably one of the most awkward times he could have brought him up but he wanted to fill the silence with something... anything at all, even the hard things they failed to discuss very well. He knew Katniss hadn't appreciated what he'd pulled with the locket in the arena but he still genuinely believed if he didn't make it, Gale was someone she should and would rely on. They all needed to just survive in this world, didn't they?

"He looked like he wanted to talk to you but we were kinda in a rush."

"There's a lot to say..."

She meant about 12, the fire, the Games...all the world around them. But she realized, as soon as it was out of her mouth, that there was more to it then that. The thing that tied the three of them together.

"Yeah, I can imagine."

And he knew. This whole situation was more than any of them bargained for and he was sure he and Katniss standing in front of District 12 at their first reaping never knew they would one day be in the center of political warfare. Hell, Peeta had not even expected to be alive past the first day or two. But here they were...

"Whatever happens I hope you know I've never regretted a single second."

"There might be a few I regret."

She twisted to look up into his face again, smiling. There were deeper things there, but none she want to pick at tonight.

"But most of them...I think we managed better than expected."

He met her gaze with a small smile of his own, not looking away. If he could have changed the way things went, how they met... sure, he probably would have chosen a better scenario with less... casualties. But considering what they've been through, the mere fact that they are still alive and together is beyond amazing.

"We've survived two Games together, Katniss... I'd definitely call that better than expected."

It was a pretty inarguable point. They're were survive two of the same Hunger Games together. Back to back.

"It's strange that...we went into the games barely knowing each other."

Well. She barely knew him.

He had this big urge to lean in and kiss her at that, his emotions still in a silent whirlwind inside, but he wasn't sure she'd find that appropriate when they were like this. When the cameras were on them at all times it was different. Rejecting him meant killing the Capitol's image of their love. In here they were just Peeta and Katniss, not star-crossed lovers.

But he still wanted to.

"I guess we had good chemistry?" He half-teased yet also believed, despite how much they had butted heads before the Quarter Quell.

She let out another snort of laughter. "You can say that again."

Enough good chemistry to save them in a situation they shouldn't have lived through. And it must have been something...Peeta's feelings, the truth in how he was...couldn't have been enough, alone, to overcome her awkward attempts as playing in love.

But there must have been something they saw, to move a whole nation. She looked up, studying his face, trying to see him, them, without everything she knew.

When she looked up again he felt his heart rate quicken, idly wondering if she could feel it since her head was practically leaning into his chest. He locked gazes with her despite the dark, able to see her eyes.

Why was this so much easier when they were fighting for their lives and covered in blood and dirt?

"I er..." His fingers started to fiddle with the ends of her hair, finding comfort in it. "So let's say hypothetically I wanted to kiss you..."

Real smooth.

Her eyes went wide, not sure what to say. Because it was like her brain went to a screeching halt right then.

"Uhhh..."

What if he did? It wasn't like this would be their first kiss. Her mind went back to the kisses on the beach, and it wasn't a bad place to go.

And this was their room. And no one was here. This was their place.

But something was still resisting, illogically. Maybe not illogically. There were other factors.

And all of this lead to her just staring up at him wide eyed.

... Crap. What kind of guy asks something like that?

His heart was still racing but for more than just nerves now, if the flush in his face had anything to say. This was Katniss after all. He didn't want to screw up their friendship by making silly mistakes with his feelings, but at the same time he wanted her to know how he felt. He didn't want to ignore that.

This was so different though. They'd never really done this.

"Sorry... that was really dumb to ask, wasn't it?"

Something about his apology got her brain out of the loop of thoughts and back in the moment.

The moment where he was waiting. For her.

Their first kiss that was not on film, that was...100% their choice, because they wanted to, with no string attached. No death waiting the next day, no political agenda.

Something about that might her feel so light, so giddy. And before her mind could pick it apart, she pushed herself up, pressing her lips to his.

It was like that moment in the cave almost when she first kissed him, when despite knowing it was for the people watching, he had still felt that spark and that warmth that was special just for them. It was the same here in their room underground with the beds pushed together and responsibilities too ominous to avoid waiting for them at the other side of the closed doors.

A simple kiss but one that made him feel happiest that he had all day. All month. All year.

Peeta found it so easy to just relax and kiss her back, one hand that was resting on her back squeezing gently.